CHOICE

Choice is a powerful tool, but it's not easy. Once the consciousness is in place--I can choose to drink a glass of wine with my dinner, or choose not to--there's still a decision to be made. I found myself torn, last night. One part of my mind was using the seductive argument: come on, what difference can it make, just one glass? And another part struggling with the commitment that I made to myself--to no one else--to do what I must to restore the sense of physical well-being that I've lost. Not easy. I listened, eventually, to the wiser voice, and made the decision to pass up on the glass of wine.

So... yesterday:

7 AM, the usual cuppa

9:00 AM, breakfast. A single egg (instead of the usual two), a large slice of buttered toast, coffee with milk. Did I have fruit? I forget. Must make contemporaneous notes.

10:30 AM, gym. 20 minutes on the elliptical walker to warm up, then an hour of strenuous exercise with Shanna.

12:30 PM, lunch. One slice of chopped ham, handful of chopped tiny tomatoes, 1/8 th chopped avocado topped with spring onion and dressing.

4:00 PM, snack. One half apple with almond butter

7:00 PM, dinner. One kosher hot dog, one half roasted squash stuffed with brown rice and leftover vegetable pasta sauce (homemade) topped with melted cheese.

No dessert, no ice cream!

Not to be too delicate about these things, I took a couple of stool softeners last night at bed time, hoping to help with the constipation problem. As they say in Germany, "mal sehen"--we'll see.